Not Yours Anymore
by DevlinV1
Summary: [FIN:2004:Slash & mentioned Hardycest] After saving Shannon Moore from a fist fight with Matt Hardy, RVD gets pulled into the middle of a soap opera turned real. Is Shannon really looking for a savior, or is there something more to Matt's psychotic rage?
1. The Beginning

**Not Yours Anymore**

**By Archangel**

_**Chapter 1**_

As soon as he managed to stumble down the steps behind the black curtains Shannon's eyes locked onto the nearest water cooler, throwing open the lid to grab a bottle of water from the half melted ice. He opened it up and poured it straight over his head. Half the bottle was empty by the time he stopped. He was thoroughly drenched in the freezing water and it had never felt so good to be that cold. He capped the bottle and tossed it back into the cooler without care then turned to navigate the unfamiliar halls on his way back to the locker room.

It had been only a week ago that Shannon had been issued his transfer from Smackdown! to RAW. He had been thrilled and worried with the prospect. RAW was the more respectable show, held only really huge talents, and could boost his career like no tomorrow. But Matt was there. Matt Hardy, of whom he had fought so hard to separate from, had transferred to RAW not long ago as well. Matt's transfer had also caused its pros and cons. Shannon was finally free to be Shannon Moore, instead of merely Matt's First MFer. He was no longer under that strict control, no insults, no beatings, and no more having to live up to the unrealistic expectations of Mattitude. Maybe Matt could be perfect, in his own delusional mind, but Shannon could never please him. It's hard to make a psychopath happy without killing yourself.

Tonight had been Shannon's premiere on the show, shocking the hell out of everyone in the audience when his music had played. He had been welcomed, though. He was pleased to see he actually had a larger fan base with the RAW crowd than Smackdown!. His match had been against Maven. It was merely an introduction match of sorts. It was set just to get him into the roll of the show, introduce him to the new crowd, and basically show off what he could do. He had won, but his victory didn't feel very rewarding. Maven may be considered unimportant to the show, but he was a pro. Even with his short amount of time in WWE he had talent like no tomorrow and the power to back it up. Shannon had gotten whipped before he gained the upper hand. Which was why he was leaving a dripping trail of water through the halls and still not feeling too up and up. However, he spotted the catering that had been hired for the night and couldn't help but smile. Food was a good way to cheer up.

That's when his gaze was blocked by a big black and white V1 t-shirt. Shannon slowly looked up at its owner, staring into the familiar deep brown eyes of Matt Hardy. He had a pleasant expression on his face, but Shannon knew that didn't mean a damn thing when it came down to their relationship. He had seen Matt smiling while beating the shit out of him. Images like that still haunted him sometimes on cold nights.

"Hi Shannon."

"Hi Matt."

"You had a pretty good match out there, little MFer." Shannon's eye twitched slightly at being called that. "You look like you put all of your effort into it."

"Of course. I wanted to win and make a good first impression."

"Oh, I see. You'll work your ass off to benefit your _own _needs, but wouldn't give a damn bit of effort into _our _needs when we were together on Smackdown!?" Matt's voice slowly started to raise with his temper.

"No. I put all of my energy into _our_ needs, Matt. It was your _personal_ needs that I refused to take part in," he shot back.

"Oh, is that so? Need I remind you what MFer stands for when it's applied to you, Shannon?"

His eyes widened slightly. "Don't you dare fucking say that in front of all these people. If you say it, Matt, I swear to God…"

Matt glanced around at the small crowd that were watching them. Even though the argument had barely gotten anywhere they had attracted the looks of many in the crew and star studded staff. In fact, all eyes were locked on them. They waited in silence to see what exactly Matt wasn't supposed to say. He merely smiled back down at Shannon.

"Oh, c'mon now. Are you ashamed of yourself for the things you did? You don't have to be. Everyone in the whole business knows that you're a Matt Fucker, not just a Follower!"

The back of Shannon's hand made a sickly loud smack as it hit Matt's face. He stumbled back in surprise, touching his already reddening cheek as if he couldn't believe Shannon had actually touched him. A second later that malicious snarl graced his usually handsome features and he lunged. Fortunately nothing happened as Shannon was suddenly scooped up by strong arms and whirled away from Matt's reach. Behind him Shannon could hear the voice of Booker T yelling at Matt, obviously doing his best to hold the other man off. Shannon twisted out of the hold he was in and came face to face with Rob Van Dam. The martial artist had a worried expression as he looked down at Shannon, then back at Matt.

"You gotta get outta here," he said as he took Shannon's arm and pulled him down the hall quickly.

"But what about all my stuff!"

"You can have the crew take care of it for you! In moments like this you don't have much choice!"

As they ran through the halls, Shannon could hear Matt's bellowing voice echoing behind him. He was following and gaining fast. The ex-baseball player was quick on his feet to say the least. Rob stopped suddenly, halting Shannon as well. He dropped a set of keys into his hand.

"How'd you get my keys?"

"Never mind. Just get out to your truck and lock yourself in. Wait for me, okay?"

"What are you gonna do?"

They both looked down the hall as Matt rounded the corner, screaming that he was going to rip Shannon's head from his shoulders. He looked like he meant it.

"I'm gonna stop him from ever wanting to come near you again," Rob said sternly. "Now go. Straight down this hall to the door at the end. It says it's an emergency exit, but it's not. Trust me."

Shannon didn't hesitate, turning and tearing off down the hall as fast as his legs could carry him. He heard the collision of Rob and Matt behind him, the start of the fight, but didn't dare look back. He was too terrified of what would happen to him if Matt were to beat Rob. Shannon would've given anything at that moment to have never heard the name Matt Hardy or about the show RAW in his life.

Once in the parking lot Shannon made a straight dash for his truck. The little white and red Ranger shone from its place underneath one of the brightest lights. He grimaced slightly as he let himself in and locked the doors, thinking that he had made a mistake in being such a showboat about a vehicle. If he'd gotten it in black it wouldn't have been so easy to spot. Shannon turned in his seat and watched the door that he had come out of only moments ago, watching and waiting to see who would emerge. It seemed like he had waited for hours before Rob burst through the door, looking around for any sign of the Ranger. Instantly Shannon started it up and backed out of his spot, watching carefully for Rob in the mirrors. Rob jumped with a grunt of pain and a look of panic.

"Go! He's right behind me!"

Sure enough as Shannon fought with the sticky gear shift he saw Matt coming towards the truck. He gave a whimper and slammed his palm as hard as he could against the stick.

"C'mon you piece of shit! First gear!"

Apparently yelling at it actually helped for once because the shifter finally moved and enabled Shannon to get at least some headway on Matt. Having a standard transmission didn't come in handy when you needed to get somewhere fast, but Shannon was a pro at handling his vehicle. Within seconds he was out of the parking lot, out of the main city, and headed for the freeway. Once he saw the on ramp sign he started to calm down. He knew he was safe now. He finally let himself glance over at Rob. His eye was swollen and puffy, his hair was a mess, and he was cradling his right arm to his chest.

"Do you need to go to the hospital?"

"No. I'm okay. Nothing an ice pack or two won't heal."

"I'm sorry you got involved in this," Shannon said sadly.

"Someone had to. It can't go back to what it used to be. This isn't Smackdown!. Not everyone will stand idly by and watch someone like Matt destroy someone like you."

"Yeah, isn't that storyline already in effect? Steiner, Test and Stacy right?" Shannon chuckled, but not in a funny way.

"Yeah. I guess you could say that."

A moment of awkward silence passed between them. Shannon had to wonder what the heck Rob had been thinking when he had grabbed him away from Matt. He hadn't just stopped a fight. He was going to end up getting involved in the whole soap opera/horror story now that he had interfered. Not to mention that Matt would have a personal grudge against him. Rob was known for protecting people when he had a reason to. Like if he was in a tag team or stable of some sort, or someone was messing with a very important opponent of his, Rob would jump in and save the day if he could. But he had no reason to save Shannon. The only thing that connected them was Matt, and Rob's feud with Matt had come and gone years and years ago.

"Do you want me to take you back to the hotel?" he finally asked.

"I don't think that'd be such a cool idea just yet. You'd be better off driving to the next city before heading back there."

Shannon almost gave a shudder at the thought of Matt waiting for him. "Yeah, you're right."

"You hungry? I just saw a sign for Denny's at the next exit."

Shannon blinked, thinking of the catered food he had been aiming for before everything else had happened. His stomach growled noisily in response. He blushed slightly, but put on his turn signal and headed for the ramp, hearing Rob laugh quietly at him.

"We both look like hell and you wanna go to a restaurant? Wouldn't you rather have McDonald's or something else with a drive through?"

"Well I'd rather have food than total crap, but Denny's is the closest it gets right around here. Plus, this truck is way to small for someone my size."

Shannon looked over at him as he stopped for a red light. He was right. All of Rob's six foot tall, 235 pound frame seemed quite squished into the small truck. Shannon grinned and drove to the Denny's parking lot without another word, though, he did insist that Rob at least tame his wild ponytail before going in. The two of them entered, pleased to see that there were hardly any people there. A pretty young waitress came over to them with a smile.

"Hi guys. Just finish the show?"

"Yeah," Rob answered her. "Think you could get us something kinda away from public view?"

"I sure can. Is it just gonna be the two of you?"

"Definitely."

"Then follow me."

She lead the two of them through the dining room quickly, hoping that no one would get the chance to bother them, and led them into the section that was usually closed in the late hours. She turned on the lights for them and let them pick their table, which Rob chose near the window that overlooked the highway. After taking their drink orders she left them alone.

"I'm surprised she didn't spaz out when she saw you," Shannon said.

"Why? Is my hair really that bad?"

"No," Shannon giggled. "I mean because of who you are."

"Well, what about you? She knew who you were, too."

"Yeah, but most people don't care. Unless they're rabid little teeny bopping teenagers. Then I get attacked sometimes. They seem to forget that I'm ten years older than most of them."

"They always do. They don't like thinking about the fact that we're completely out of their league. I think it's okay, though. As long as they love me and respect me and don't try to pull my hair it's all good."

"Pull your hair?"

"What, that's never happened to you? They wanna touch the hair, but end up yanking it on accident."

And so the conversation went. Surprising that two who seemed to have little in common could have so much to talk about. Aside from giving their orders and thanking the waitress when the food was delivered, Rob and Shannon never stopped talking. The topics spanned from the crazy fans to their home towns, from their preference in ring attire to what they would've been if wrestling hadn't existed. By the time Shannon got the ice cream he had ordered for dessert, though, the conversation had come down to what each of them had tried to avoid. Matt Hardy, and his relationship with Shannon.

"Why is there green goo on top of that stuff?" Rob asked curiously.

"It's supposed to be apple flavored syrup. Wanna bite?" he offered.

"No, no, no. I'm cool." A silent pause and Rob finally asked the question that wouldn't leave him alone. "What the heck happened between you and Matt?"

Shannon's face paled slightly, but he answered anyway. "You name it and it happened. Good or bad."

"I know this embarrassed you earlier, but what did he mean when he called you—"

"Please, don't say that."

Rob stopped, taking in the shameful look on the boy's face. "So he _did _mean it that way."

"Yes, he did. It wasn't my fault, though. He lured me into it. Not only did he get me completely shitfaced drunk, but he convinced me that he loved me. I should've known all he wanted was to get in my pants." Shannon scowled and took an angry bite of ice cream. "Then as if that wasn't bad enough he told me I had no choice. He'd kick me off his team."

"He can't do that. That's blackmail."

"He did it. He wasn't caught either. On the other hand he didn't get a chance to take advantage of it… me very often. I was always injured from losing matches."

Rob arched a brow. "You lost on purpose?"

"Sometimes. If I knew I'd have to deal with him back at the hotel I would do everything I could to piss him off. Then I'd get my ass stomped in the ring and then back in the locker room. There'd be no way I could even lie still and take it without getting hurt more."

Again a period of silence fell between them. Rob rested his head on his folded arms, watching Shannon devour his sweets like they were life itself. He was still only a little boy in Rob's eyes even though they weren't that far apart in years. He looked much younger than he actually was, especially since he kept his face clean shaven for the show. His full face and fine blond hair made for a darling childish appearance. The green syrup on the corner of his mouth added a nice touch, too. Rob snickered and pointed it out.

"You got a little slime drooling down your face there."

"Huh?" Shannon snatched a napkin to clean himself off. "Other than making a mess of myself, I think I'm ready to head back."

"You sure you wanna go back to the hotel?"

"Yeah. By this time Matt will be in the middle of… Lita's legs judging by the way he's been acting lately." Rob winced at the comment. "Either that or he's already asleep. He may be bound and determined to make my life living hell, but he won't lose sleep over it."

"If you're sure. I'll take care of the check."

"Good, cuz my wallet is in my bag at the arena."

Rob laughed at that, throwing down a hundred dollar bill without even bothering to ask for the check. The girl had earned her tip, which would be about eighty dollars if Rob guessed right. He followed Shannon back through the almost deserted restaurant and out into the parking lot. The hood of the detailed white and red low ride still sparkled even in the dim light where Shannon had parked it. The truck matched its owner in Rob's opinion. No matter how dark it may be he thought Shannon shone like another sun. Such a sweet boy, polite and kind even despite all of the pain he had gone through in his life. As Shannon started around the front of the truck, Rob grabbed his shoulder.

"Shannon, listen…"

"Yeah, Rob?"

For a moment Rob just looked at him, a somewhat saddened look on his face. Before he knew it Shannon was wrapped up in those strong arms once again. Rob squeezed him as tight as he could without suffocating or hurting him, muttering something about being sorry for all the shit that had happened to him. Shannon could barely hear any of it. He was shocked at the tenderness Rob was showing him. He was even more shocked when Rob pulled back just to lean in and kiss him. His eyes widened as he felt Rob's lips upon his own, not daring to respond out of fear. But Rob pulled away in an instant and looked down at him worriedly.

"Shannon, are you okay?"

"Why? Why'd you do that?"

Rob frowned. "Because I wanted to. I just want to show you that I care."

It seemed so familiar. The soft voice, the soothing touches, and the pleading look in those golden eyes. For a moment Shannon's mind replaced them with Matt's bittersweet chocolate gaze. He quickly looked away, covering his face. Matt had tainted his whole life so much that he couldn't even see straight sometimes. Rob's arms came around him again, this time from behind, and he rubbed his chilled arms to bring him warmth. His lips brushed Shannon's ear before he whispered.

"I care about you. I want to protect you. I don't ever want to see you hurt again," he whispered.

"I looked into your eyes a second ago and all I could see was Matt staring back at me," he hissed. He was angry, not with Rob, but with himself. "I let him get to me so deeply that he's all I ever think about. He forced himself into my mind and my body. He's practically all I know."

Rob squeezed him tighter, hearing the withheld tears underneath the fierce tone of voice. "You're not his anymore. You hear me? He can't touch you ever again."

"I know, but… For some reason I want him to. I want him back just to have those moments when he was sweet to me, when he was kind. He told me that he loved me and I think that he meant it at least sometimes!"

"Maybe he did, Shannon," Rob mumbled as he forced him to turn around, "but that's over now. You remember what nearly happened tonight. You saw what I had to go through in order to keep him off. Even with my strength he still got up cuz he wanted to hurt you so badly."

Shannon gave a small sob, pushing himself back into Rob's arms to muffle his cries against his chest. Rob held him, petting his hair and rubbing his back. He didn't try to stop him. He knew that Shannon would take a long time to heal from all the damage that Matt had done to him. The emotional roller coaster ride had left him with so many scars. As Rob listened to the wailing sounds coming from the boy in his arms he made a silent vow that Matt Hardy would pay in some way for this. It was bad karma to think such things. He knew it, but he couldn't help the way he felt. He had enjoyed punching the eldest Hardy brother square in the face. His thoughts were quickly drawn back to the present as Shannon pulled himself out of his hold, wiping the tears from his face quickly.

"I'm sorry. I'm making a complete fool of myself."

"No, you're not. You're hurting and letting it show. It's good for you actually. Holding everything inside can cause more problems than I bet you even know about."

Shannon huffed with a smirk. "Yeah, I bet, Mr. Zen Master."

Rob only smiled, his hand coming up to brush a few stray tears from Shannon's cheek. He finally got Shannon to look at him with a small smile on his face. He looked straight into his eyes and didn't turn away again. Rob leaned down to him, watching his expression as he drew closer. There was obvious nervousness on his young features. He drew back just before their lips touched. Rob stopped, asking him with only a look, and getting his answer in a slight shake of the head. He pulled away again with an understanding smile.

"It's okay, Shannon. I understand."

"I'm sorry. I just can't yet."

Rob noted the word 'yet' and petted Shannon's hair. "It's okay. Seriously. You've been through a lot lately. I should've known better than to come on so soon."

"It's not that I'm not interested…"

"I know. Believe me, it's okay. Let's just go back to the hotel and get some rest."

Shannon nodded and pulled from his hold, going to his side of the truck. They rode back in silence. Each of them thought over the events of the evening, lost in their own thoughts all the way up to the moment when Shannon unlocked his room door. He paused and looked back at Rob, who spoke up quickly.

"Don't think that you have to invite me in. Cuz you don't. There's no obligation here at all."

"That's not what I was thinking actually. I just…" He bit his lower lip for a brief second. "I'm scared to be alone. Matt knows what room I'm in and he knows how to unlock the card readers without even using a card."

"Do you want me to stay?" he asked hesitantly.

"Yes, but please don't think I'm trying to be some sort of tease or anything. I don't want to give you the wrong idea."

Rob almost laughed out loud at that. "Shannon, how could I possibly think a Southern gentleman like you was a tease?"

Shannon got a strange look on his face, half flattery and half embarrassment, laughing as well. He finally pushed the door open and let Rob in behind him. It was technically their first night together, but Rob stood by his morals and took the lumpy couch instead of sharing Shannon's bed. For the first time in ages Shannon slept peacefully through the night.

**End Chapter 1**

_Legalities: "I'm With You" by Avril Lavigne is copyright to her and her record label. Scott Steiner and Christian Cage are copyright to TNA Wrestling. Chris Jericho is copyright to himself. Rob Van Dam, Shannon Moore, Matt Hardy, and any other mentioned characters are property of World Wrestling Entertainment. I claim no knowledge of each of the characters sexual preferences or lives. This is a story of fiction, none of these events are real. I received absolutely no profit from this story._


	2. Numb

**Not Yours Anymore**

**By Archangel**

_**Chapter 2: Numb**_

Shannon sighed quietly as he pulled his shirt down over his head, straightening and smoothing it flat over his chest. He hummed to himself as he began running a brush through his hair. In another part of the locker room he heard a voice echoing over the running water. He paused and looked in the direction with a small smile. Rob had started singing the song he was humming. The man had no singing talent whatsoever, but Shannon still thought it was cute.

"Can't you see that you're smothering me, holding too tightly afraid to lose control."

The water stopped along with the singing, only a quiet hum following. Shannon snickered and went digging through his duffel bag to find the pants he was going to wear during his match. It proved a difficult task as his mind drifted slightly to all that had happened in the past two weeks. After his initial rough encounter with Matt Hardy, he and Rob had become inseparable. It was partly due to the fact that Rob was being very protective of him, but it was also due to the growing affection between them. Rob had revealed his intentions the very night that he had saved Shannon from Matt's wrath, holding him and kissing him, telling him repeatedly that he wanted to keep him safe and stay with him all the time. That first kiss had scared the bejesus out of him. He cherished it, though. He wasn't ready for anything like that quite yet, but he knew he would be soon enough. As long as Rob stuck around and kept treating him like a prince.

"Well, I come out of the shower and get treated to the sexiest sight I've seen all year!"

Shannon quickly straightened and whirled around, his cheeks burning hot with embarrassment. Rob only grinned after catching him bent over in only his shirt and boxers. Shannon huffed and threw his brush at him, which was easily dodged.

"Asshole," Shannon said without sincerity.

"Gorgeous," Rob countered.

Shannon rolled his eyes. He couldn't win any argument with him. Rob thought Shannon was sexy when he was angry and comments like that always killed his temper easily. Rob went into his own bag to dig out his clothes, finally turning his eyes away from Shannon. He took advantage of it and pulled out his pants to finish getting dressed.

"So who's up for you tonight, Shan?"

"I got Christian."

"Really? Damn, they're moving you up fast aren't they?"

He looked up with a broad smile. "They like me here. They actually want to give me a push."

"That's cool! That's totally cool. Now turn your happy self around so I can drop my towel." Shannon blinked at first, but then smirked and crossed his arms. He obviously was refusing to turn around. Rob narrowed his eyes at him, but had a wicked smirk of his own. "You little pervert."

"Hey you commented on my ass a few minutes ago."

"Your fully clothed ass I point out."

Shannon thought that meant he should turn around because it wasn't fair otherwise, but Rob turned away from him and the towel dropped to the floor. Shannon's eyes went wide. He looked him over slowly, taking in the chiseled muscles under bronzed skin. The only place that didn't appear to be hard as rock was Rob's butt. Of course you didn't have to see him nude to know that he had what most would call a "ghetto booty." Shannon giggled a bit getting Rob's attention. He looked over his shoulder.

"Ya know it's not exactly comforting to hear laughter when you're standing around naked."

"Sorry. I don't mean anything by it."

Rob slowly turned back around, holding one of his airbrushed singlets in front of him. It was the only thing hiding him from Shannon eyes. The boy's eyes softened at the beautiful sight, eyes roaming once again to take in everything that he could see. As soon as his gaze trailed over the singlet Rob moved it aside. Shannon gave a short gasp and quickly looked away.

"Holy shit," he muttered, steeling a quick glance back.

"What's that comment for?"

"Um… Let's just say I'm impressed." He looked back at him, this time looking at his face. "Stripping get you a little excited?"

"Maybe. More than likely it was looking at you that did it, though."

Shannon giggled again. "I have to wonder how you manage to pack all that into that tight outfit."

Now Rob was blushing more than Shannon. "Okay, enough! I gotta get dressed."

"Good luck!" Shannon laughed.

Quite a few items of clothing came flying at Shannon's head then, causing him to duck and cover, not that it helped much. Eventually the two of them did get completely dressed and ready for their matches, then followed the scent of food to where catering was setup. They each grabbed a few light things, salad and water that would stay down during a match, and settled at a table that was nearby. Of course their peace was short lived as Rob looked up and saw Matt coming down the hall towards them.

"Don't look up. He's coming."

Shannon glanced up at Rob, but then quickly back down at his plate. He and Rob had decided to do their best to just ignore Matt and keep their distance. Hopefully he would leave Shannon alone after the fight that had happened on Shannon's first night. Matt had gotten a pay cut for it and warning to not bother his co-workers. Of course he was well known for not always following the rules. Sure enough he came up to them, snatching a cherry tomato from Shannon's plate to pop in his mouth.

"Hey guys. What's going on?"

"Didn't you get told to stay away from us?" Rob asked.

"No, only warned not to start fights. I'm not here to do that. I just wanna let you know something, Rob."

Shannon slowly looked up at Matt to see his eyes were locked on Rob, staring with those narrowed eyes that meant he was seething. He glanced him over slowly, noting Matt's arm twitching and his foot tapping. He was going to start a fight. He only got this antsy when he intended to do something physical.

"Well, go ahead. You have my attention," Rob said.

"I don't know what you're after with Shannon, but I doubt that it's anything honorable or moral. And if that's the case then you should know that I will kill you if you ever lie a hand on him. He's mine whether he likes it or not. I even laid my mark on that fair skin of his."

"Really? I'm not surprised. I heard on the Discovery Channel once that primitive animals always marked their mates." Rob took a bite of celery and shrugged. "Of course, my mouth is bigger and my teeth are sharper so if I wanted to I could just replace yours."

"You never will. The second you get near him he's going to freak out on you. He'll start remembering the things I did to him. He's scarred for life, Rob. He'll even admit that. I ruined him."

Rob glared up at the proud smirk on Matt's face, wishing he could wipe it off with his fist. "Is that what happens when you fuck people, Matt? You warp their minds? That explains a lot. Now I know why Jeff acts the way he does."

Matt's eyes went wide at what Rob was insinuating, then a loud growl came from him before he lunged forward. Shannon stuck his foot out quickly. As Rob jumped back Matt tripped and fell straight to his face on the concrete floor. To add to his torture, Shannon grabbed one of the mustard jars and 'accidentally' dumped it on Matt's head.

"Oh, I'm sorry Matty! I know how much you hate mustard!" he laughed as he quickly skirted away.

"You dirty fucking whore! I'm going to get you, Shannon! Believe me I'm gonna get you back and you'll never walk away from me again."

"You can't touch him, Matt," Rob interrupted. "He told you to shove off, the company has told you to stay away from him, and now I'm telling you. He's not yours anymore, Matt."

Matt got to his feet, trying to wipe some of the mustard from his face and out of his hair, his eyes locking on Rob to give him a deadly stare. Then he looked down at Shannon. The coldness in his gaze made him shiver and step closer to Rob for protection. Matt gave a snarl.

"If I can't have him, no one can."

With that Matt walked back towards his locker room, obviously in need of another shower. Rob turned to Shannon, seeing his face had turned an even paler shade than usual. He was shaking terribly. Rob pulled him back over to the table and sat him down in the chair that hadn't gotten splattered with mustard. Shannon wrapped his arms around himself, fighting back tears as his teeth chattered. It was almost as if he were freezing.

"Shannon? Shannon, stop this. You can't let him get to you like this."

"I can't help it. The things that he says and the way he looks at me, Rob, just makes me feel like he wants to kill me. And I think he actually could if he had the chance."

Rob's heart ached at hearing the emotionless tone of voice Shannon used whenever he spoke of Matt. No matter what he said or how his body reacted to his thoughts his voice always went almost monotone. It was as if he really didn't feel anything whenever Matt was around. Like he was going numb. Rob looked around briefly to see no one around but some of the backstage crew. He leaned down and kissed Shannon's cheek, stroking the opposite one with the palm of his hand.

"You need to calm down. You have a match in just a few minutes."

"I know. I know," he sighed. "Yours is right after mine right?"

"Yeah. Why?"

"You're gonna take me back to the hotel right?"

"Of course."

"Okay. I'll wait for you by the back door after I get my stuff together. Matt won't be able to find me out there and then we can just leave as soon as you pick up your bags."

Rob smiled a little at him, leaning his forehead on Shannon's. "I love you."

Shannon smiled back and nodded slightly. "I know."

It hurt slightly to hear such a response, but Rob knew exactly why it came. Shannon was still healing, slowly but surely. He didn't mind. He'd wait forever if he had to as long as Shannon said those words to him someday. He kissed his cheek again and took his hands, pulling him to his feet. He led him through the halls again towards the arena entrance. Shannon looked anything but ready to go into a match, but there wasn't much choice at the moment. He was on in only a minute or two.

"Are you sure you're gonna be okay?"

"Yeah. Just don't forget to meet me out back."

"I'll grab my bag and come running. I won't even shower."

"Good. I just want to go to bed more than anything right now." He stepped forward into Rob's embrace, apparently not caring who saw them. "Can we do that when we get back? I'll go to bed, you shower and then join me."

"Join you?" he asked with surprise.

"Yes. The couch futons are killing your back," he looked up at him, "and I trust you can behave. You can hold me and not go any further than that, right?"

"It'd be an honor to hold you as you sleep," he whispered very quietly as Christian came walking towards them.

"Okay! Break it up! I don't wanna see your mush!" Christian exclaimed and waved a hand at them.

Shannon didn't make a move to pull away, only looking at Christian in questioning. "Like no one has ever seen you hugging Jericho a million times!"

"That's a little different, kid. You two are a couple. Jericho and I aren't and never will be."

"I bet," Shannon smirked.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Shannon shook his head and finally pulled away from Rob. His music was just starting so he went quickly up the stairs surrounded by black curtains. Rob watched him until he disappeared around the corner. He sighed a bit, but was startled when Christian touched his shoulder.

"I'll walk with him to the locker room."

Rob had never been more relieved in his life. "Thank you, Christian."

"No problem. I know you have a match and someone needs to keep an eye on him just in case…" he trailed off as his music started up. "Well, you know. See ya!"

"Good luck, but don't stomp on my boyfriend too much!"

Rob could hear Christian laughing at that as he walked away to head back to the catering area. He needed something more in his belly to make it stop doing flip flops after the almost encounter with Matt earlier.

"I'm really sorry about your ribs, Shannon," Christian said as he walked back to the locker room.

"I told you it's okay. They're just sore is all."

"I still feel bad. I didn't want to go that rough on you."

"Christian, we're opponents. You're supposed to kick my ass, and I kick yours. That's what wrestling is all about." Shannon stopped outside the locker room he and Rob shared, eyeing the door suspiciously. There was a light on inside. He looked up at Christian. "You open it."

"What? What if someone's waiting in there with a chair? Or worse?"

"Better you than me. Besides I know Rob told you to protect me while he was in the ring."

"Actually, I offered out of the kindness of my heart," he huffed as he shoved the door open. He poked his head in and looked around. "Looks like you guys just forgot to shut the lights out. Not a soul to be seen."

Shannon looked into the room himself just to be sure. It was completely empty save for two duffle bags, used towels, dirty clothes, and two leather jackets. He breathed a sigh of relief and thanked Christian for walking with him. Once the door was closed behind him he made quick work of gathering his things. He even went about getting Rob's things ready, pulling out fresh clothes and lying them on the bench then stuffing all the dirty things back in the bag. Then he pulled on his long leather trench and walked out, making sure to check the halls first. He made his way to the back of the arena as stealthily as possible, checking with the crew and security whenever he ran across them to see if anyone had seen Matt. Once he was outside he felt a thousand pounds lighter. He sighed and leaned against the building, dropping his bag down to the ground. It was raining, a cold Northern rain that could chill a person to the bone, but Shannon was grateful for it. It would chill his burning skin and hopefully numb his feelings away. Now all he could do was wait for Rob. His match was scheduled to be short so at tops it'd be twenty minutes.

Forty minutes later Shannon shivered and wondered where Rob was. He was soaking wet now, his hair plastered to his face and the collar of his coat. He didn't care about that, though. He was worried about whether or not Rob had met up with Matt again. It was the only explanation he could think of as he stood around watching the rain and wishing he was at home. Or at least in the hotel with Rob. A song popped into his head as the situation seemed to fit all too well. He sang to himself as he tended to do often.

"I'm standing on the bridge, I'm waiting in the dark, I thought that you'd be here by now. There's nothing but the rain, no footsteps on the ground, I'm listening, but there's no sound. Isn't anyone trying to find me? Won't somebody come take me home?"

That was when he heard the door behind him open. He turned around with a smile on his face that quickly faded as he saw who was coming towards him. Without a second thought he whirled and took off running through the parking lot, his bag forgotten, fishing through his pockets for the spare keys to Rob's car. He found them and spotted the car only a few more yards away. If he could just make it there he could lock himself in then take off on his own. He suddenly heard the thumping footsteps behind, pounding the pavement as they closed in on him. He was tackled and slammed to the ground hard. The keys flew from his hand to God only knew where. He struggled and fought, but he was no match for such enraged strength. He never had been. He was rolled onto his back and pinned down, forced to stare up into that familiar face once more.

"That was a pretty sad song you were singing back there, baby. I hate seeing you sad. You're prettier when you're screaming in pain," Matt hissed at him. "Let me take you home, Shannon. I'll make you feel all better."

"No! Get off of me!" He started struggling again, trying anything to throw Matt's weight off balance to gain an opening. "Help me! Someone please help me!"

"Your screams can't be heard in that building. The fans are cheering, the wrestlers are involved in the show, and not to mention there's a few feet of steel and concrete between you and them. You're all mine now, Shannon."

Matt tore open the front of the trench coat, sending buttons flying. Next he grabbed at Shannon's shirt and ripped it down the center. Shannon threw a punch at his face that never hit target. Matt only dodged and threw his own fist into the mix, colliding with Shannon's temple. The world went blurry and spotted for him as Matt moved further down his body. He was distinctly aware of his pants being yanked to his knees, the cold water and pavement bringing him to his senses. He screamed as he started to fight again, kicking and trying to shove Matt off with all of his strength. It made things quite a bit more difficult for him to say the least. He snarled, growls coming from his throat as he tried to catch Shannon's flailing limbs to pin him down again.

"Get off of him!"

Before either of them could look to see who was yelling a boot collided with the side of Matt's head. He was sent to the side roughly, his forehead slamming into the bumper of one of the cars, and he dropped like a rock to the ground. Shannon looked at Matt's unconscious form, then looked up at Rob who was still in a karate-like stance. The shocked and frightened expression on the martial artist's face struck him as odd. Shouldn't he have been angry with Matt? But then Shannon realized what he was seeing. He was half naked, bloody and scraped up from the fight, and soaking wet from the rain and the fact that he'd been shoved into a large puddle. He was half naked. That was the thought most prominent in his mind. Matt had been stripping him as they fought. He started to shake uncontrollably, his breaths coming in short gulps as he tried to sit up and pull himself together. Rob instantly reached down to help him up, conveniently grabbing him by the belt of his pants so to pull them up as well. As soon as he had his pants back on and done up Rob pulled the coat closed tightly then pulled Shannon into his arms.

"This is over tonight. No more. I'm letting Vince know exactly what's going on and Matt is going to be fired. He's never going to come near you again."

"He was pulling my clothes off. Dear God, Rob, he was stripping me down like he was planning on…" Shannon stopped before stating those words, switching to something just as closely related. "He said I was his."

"No, you're not!" Rob yelled as he clung tighter to him. "You don't belong to anyone, Shannon! He brainwashed you! You're free. You're a free person. No one can own you."

Shannon listened as he heard soft sobs coming from Rob's chest, each one making the taller body jerk as he tried to hold them back. Despite the fact that he was crying Rob turned and led Shannon to his car, letting him in, starting it up and turning the heat on, then going back to gather their bags that were still by the back door. Shannon locked the doors and watched just in case Matt should get to his feet again, but it didn't look like that would be happening anytime soon. Rob finally got in the car, throwing the bags in the back seat, and sped away from the arena.

At the hotel they each got ready for bed in silence. Without even asking Rob pulled out the couch futon to put sheets on it. Shannon watched him from where he lie in the other bed, thinking about their original plans to sleep together that night. He knew that was impossible now. He couldn't imagine anyone ever touching him again. Not after what Matt had tried to do to him. Shannon was completely aware of what had nearly happened to him. Matt had intended to rape him. There was no other explanation.

He realized Rob was staring at him then, blinking back to reality and returning his gaze. His golden eyes were filled with sorrow. Shannon knew that his own gaze was empty. He had a habit of turning himself off whenever something bad happened. This was more than just bad, though. This was horrific. It was something out of a slasher movie. He wondered if he'd ever turn back on again.

"I'm going to fix this, Shannon," Rob voice cut through his thoughts. "I'm going to stop him once and for all. And I'm going to give you your life and happiness back. I swear by it."

Tears welled up in Shannon's eyes at hearing those words. He nodded silently and watched Rob lie down on the squeaking futon, trying his best to make himself comfortable. Shannon turned off the lamp and laid down as well, staring at the shadowed form on the other bed. He cried because he knew that Rob would never be able to keep his promise. Matt would never stop until he either got what he wanted or killed everyone in his path. Shannon knew what he had to do. There was only two ways to stop this. He'd try the first option first thing in the morning.

**End Chapter 2**

_Legalities: "I'm With You" by Avril Lavigne is copyright to her and her record label. Scott Steiner and Christian Cage are copyright to TNA Wrestling. Chris Jericho is copyright to himself. Rob Van Dam, Shannon Moore, Matt Hardy, and any other mentioned characters are property of World Wrestling Entertainment. I claim no knowledge of each of the characters sexual preferences or lives. This is a story of fiction, none of these events are real. I received absolutely no profit from this story._


	3. I'm With You

**Not Yours Anymore**

**By Archangel**

_**Chapter 3: I'm With You**_

He stood outside of the door looking at the black numbers that were glued to it. Room number 369. Something about that number seemed ominous. All multiples of three. Surely there was something symbolic and evil associated with them, judging by the way he shook as he stood there. He knew better, though. The evil was what was inside, not the door itself. He raised his hand, pausing and thinking about turning back. He could run back to bed and no one would know he was even here. He knocked. The door opened only a second later with Matt standing there with a toothbrush in his mouth and a bandage on his head. His eyes widened in surprise as he blinked at Shannon. He motioned him in as he turned back to the bathroom to rinse out his mouth. Shannon stepped inside and pushed the door shut behind him, but he couldn't will himself any further into the room. His knees were about to give out as it was.

"So, what brings you here?" Matt asked as he came back out of the bathroom.

"I… I don't know. I just…" he stuttered.

"Yes?"

He didn't want to admit it. He didn't want to tell Matt that he was giving up. He wanted to smash his face in, slit his throat, run away, anything but stand here leaning against the door for support, trembling and scared to death. He'd rather die than come back into this, but he thought about Rob. He envisioned those sad golden eyes. He swallowed his pride.

"I wanna be an MFer again," he whispered.

"Oh, do you? What makes you think I'll let you after last night?" Matt walked away from him to start picking up his clothes in preparation for leaving later. "What makes you think I don't intend to just kill you and your new lover after what you did?"

Shannon shivered at those words, but forced himself to walk towards him. "Matty, I'm sorry." Matt looked at him with a small smile. Shannon remembered he loved being called Matty. "Please, Matty. I don't know what I was thinking. Can we just go back to how it was before?"

"Before? Before RVD came in to be your knight in yin yang armor? Before you broke off from Mattitude? When everything was fine and perfect between us?"

Shannon forced a smile. "Yeah. We can just forget everything can't we, Matty?"

"No," he said sternly, his mood changing in a flash. "No, we can't."

"But Matty—"

"Stop it. Just take your pathetic little ass back to your nice warm bed with Rob. Spend all your time with him, Shannon, because it's not gonna last. You're gonna watch him bleed to death."

Shannon's blood ran cold as he looked at what Matt had in his hand. It was one of those hunting knives his father had given him. He started to shake as he watched Matt twirl it in his fingers like a pro, not missing a beat. He was obviously skilled with it. And he wanted to use those skills on Rob. Rob. Shannon's precious savior and the whole reason he was even in this room at that moment. He grit his teeth and stepped up to Matt, forcing him to turn to face him, and stared stubbornly into his eyes.

"You can have me. You can do anything you want with me. I'll never leave. I'll never say a word to anyone. You can make me your little slave, or pet, or anything you want. Just leave Rob alone and I'm all yours."

Matt nearly dropped his knife at hearing such a declaration. He arched a brow and rubbed his chin, thinking the offer over carefully. As he seemed to be thinking he unsheathed the knife again. He ran the cold steel down Shannon's arm, making the boy shiver again.

"Anything I want?" Shannon nodded, watching the knife move slowly up to his chest, the point pricking him slightly. "What if I only want you dead?"

"Then so be it if it'll save Rob," he muttered.

"Hm, I dunno if I want someone so dedicated to another man. That might be a turn off to say the least."

"You won't ever know. I'll worship you like a God if you want me to, Matty. Please, I'll do anything."

"Get on your knees and beg."

Shannon blinked, not sure what to think at first. Matt was serious. He pulled the knife away from him and stepped back once, waiting for him to do it. Shannon looked down at the beige carpet beneath him. He took a deep breath and slowly kneeled down, then dropped his other knee down as well, settling back onto his feet to sit. He kept his head lowered. He knew Matt would recognize these gestures. He was well versed in Japanese culture and this had its roots well into the ancient times. Shannon squeezed his eyes shut and forced himself to bow down, his hands on the floor next to face, with his nose almost touching the carpet.

"Please, Matty. Please, take me back and leave Rob alone. I'm begging you."

"Mmm, doing it the proper way, huh? Very cultural of you, Shannon. Lift your head." Shannon rose from his bent position, sitting on his feet underneath him. "Since you're already down there anyway and you excited me so much with your pleads…"

Matt trailed off as he undid the red and gold pants he was wearing. Shannon's eyes locked on his crotch without wanting to, knowing exactly what he was going to be forced into. He sighed quietly as Matt situated himself then gestured him forward. Shannon leaned up, setting himself to just go ahead and do it and get it over with, but Matt grabbed his chin. He looked up at him in questioning. Matt only smirked and reached down with his other hand, taking his own hardness in grasp. He held Shannon still as he moved to run his head over his lips, rubbing a spot of precum over the soft pink skin. He trailed it upwards over his cheek as he rubbed himself on his face. Shannon was just about to close his eyes and try to block it all out when he was shoved back. Matt's open palm hit his face with mind numbing power, sending him tumbling onto his side where he knocked his head into the dresser. He looked back up to see Matt buckling his belt again and snarling at him.

"You honestly think that I would want someone so utterly pathetic? Someone who has no sense of pride? Someone who won't fight back?" Matt leaned down and spit in his face. "You're nothing without me and you're even more pitiable when you're with me. Get out of my sight."

Shannon whimpered and scrambled away, gaining his feet and fleeing from the room as quickly as he could. Tears began streaming down his face, sobs wrenching his chest and throat. He ran back into the room he was sharing with Rob, slamming the door shut and sliding down it. Rob had been awake for an hour or so going through the morning routine, but was by Shannon's side in an instant. Shannon wouldn't let him touch him, slapping his hands away and near screaming in his crying. His wails were heartbreaking.

"Shannon! What happened! Tell me what's wrong!"

"I went to him! I went back to him! And all he did was humiliate me and spit in my face! I'm not even good enough for him anymore!" Rob reached out to him, only to get his hands smacked again. "Don't touch me! I'm tainted! I'm fucking tainted with his scent and his touch! I can never get it off of me! You should've never saved me! You're gonna die because of it! He's gonna kill you!"

Suddenly there was banging on the door, scaring Shannon nearly out of his wits. A voice came trailing through that sounded like Chris Jericho.

"Hey! What's going on in there!"

"Make him go away," Shannon hissed at Rob, scrambling away from the door.

"Are you guys alright!"

"Hold on, Chris!" Rob called back then turned to Shannon. "I'm letting him in. He has a lot of pull around here, even more than me. I'm telling him."

"No! Rob, don't!"

Rob was already opening the door, though. Shannon flopped down into a chair by the window, using his shirt to wipe everything off of his face, and stared out the window as he tried to stop crying. Behind him Jericho came in and Rob started explaining everything that had been going on recently.

"You're joking right? You think that Matt would've…"

"There's no question about it, Chris. I saw it with my own eyes. What would you think if you saw two people fighting, one screaming in terror with his pants around his ankles, and the other one trying to get his own pants off?"

"But you're the only witness, Rob. And everyone knows that you and Shannon are dating."

"Well… I wouldn't exactly say that…"

"Huh?

Rob motioned for him to speak a little quieter, glancing at Shannon over his shoulder. "We're not dating officially. He's so caught up in all of this and in so much pain, with new wounds being opened every damn day, that there's no way we can be together yet. All I can do is be a shoulder to cry on and someone to protect him."

Chris sucked his lower lip in, chewing on it nervously. "So what you're saying is that the things Matt's doing are so extreme that Shannon has been permanently traumatized?"

"I'd say so, yeah."

"That may stand up in court. Or at least in the board room." Chris looked over at Shannon then at Rob. Rob nodded and stepped aside so Chris could walk over to him, kneeling down in front of the chair. "Shannon? What did Matt do to you in the parking lot?"

"He chased me down, wrestled me to the ground, and started tearing my clothes off," he muttered.

"Did he give you any reason, besides taking your clothes, to believe that he would rape you?" Shannon shuddered at that word, but nodded. "What did he do?"

"When I screamed for help he said that no one would hear me. No one would save me… And he said, 'You're all mine now' before he… tore open my coat and shirt."

"He tore your shirt? Do you still have it?"

"I dunno." Shannon looked up at Rob, who nodded. "Yeah, I do."

"We'll use that. Now here's the last question from me. Can you say all of this stuff in front of the board members?"

Shannon shivered visibly and lowered his eyes as he thought about it. He'd never been into the main room where the big meetings were held, but he'd stood outside of it once. It still was a strange memory. He'd been awestruck. Could he actually stand in front of all those important people, including the McMahon family, and tell them he had been blackmailed, abused, attacked, and nearly raped?

"Shannon? Can you do that?"

Chris reached out to touch Shannon's arm, but he instantly jerked away from his touch. Chris saw the panic that had flashed in his eyes momentarily. He would use that as part of Shannon's defense as well. No one should be that afraid of a simple pat on the arm. They would need Shannon's own words in order to get anything big accomplished, but if he was too frightened, or too ashamed to speak up then there'd be no point in even trying.

"I think I can. If Matt wasn't there I could say it. He's the only person I worry about," he said quietly. "He'll deny everything. And Vince likes him a lot. It probably won't do any good."

"It has to do something. Even if we can't get rid of him completely, we'll at least bring him into the spotlight for a while. They'll be keeping an eye on him and he'll screw up again. Then he'll be had." Jericho squeezed his shoulder. "I can tell that you're telling the truth, Shannon, and I won't let something like this go without making sure he pays the price."

"Thank you, Chris. Right now I need all the friends I can."

"You got me and Rob, Shan."

"And Christian. He knows half of what Hardy has been up to," Rob added.

"Really? I'll talk to him next, but who else would know about what's been going on?" he asked as he stood back up.

"Um… The only people that would know everything… I guess Crash, but we can't exactly ask him now," Rob said sadly.

"Yeah," Chris nodded and looked down at the floor.

"Jeff knows." Rob and Chris looked back down at Shannon. "Jeff knows everything. He's witnessed a lot of it personally, but you'll never get him to go against Matt. Those two are closer than any other brothers on the planet."

"We'll see about that. I'll make a note to call him up," Chris said sternly. "Won't go against his brother. That man is a monster, not a brother or any other sort of human being. I can't believe I used to admire him."

"We all thought we knew him, Chris. I was friends with him for a long time," Rob said.

"I've known him since high school and I never had a clue until I got involved with him here in the business," Shannon mumbled.

"I'll see what all I can do and get back to you." Chris motioned silently for Rob to follow him to the door and whispered to him. "Do you think Shannon is the only person Matt's done this kind of thing to?"

"I can't say for sure. Matt's never had any other boyfriends or girlfriends aside from Lita and we all know that didn't last long enough for anything. He only hung around with a few other people beside all of us."

"Us?"

"Yeah, the old group. Matt, Jeff, Shannon, Shane, Adam, Jay…"

"Shane, Adam, and Jay? You think any of them would have some insight?"

"Possibly. Most likely Shane. He and Shannon were in 3 Count together remember? They were pretty close."

Chris nodded, obviously thinking about a million different things at once. "Alright, I'll talk to ya later."

Rob let him out, nervously checking the hall for any sign of Matt, then closed and locked the door behind Chris. He walked back over to where Shannon still stared out the window. He leaned down to wrap his arms around his shoulders, but was jerked away from promptly. He let go without a question.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Rob. I just can't—"

"You don't have to explain anything to me. I'm in this with you and I know what's going on. I know what it's doing to you. I just wish I could do more to help."

Shannon turned in his chair, looking up at him with those sweet green eyes. "You're doing more than I could've ever asked for. I can't find the words to tell you how grateful I am."

Rob petted Shannon's hair lightly, threading the black streaks that framed his face through his fingers. He leaned down and kissed his forehead lightly. Shannon made a small noise as he reached up and rested his hand behind Rob's neck, fiddling with his sandy brown locks.

"I'd go to the ends of the earth for you," he whispered.

Shannon bit his lower lip at hearing those words, but only a second later tilted his head and kissed Rob quickly. It was so fast that Rob was stunned for a moment. He looked down at the younger man curiously. One second he had been pulling away from his affections and now he was kissing him? Rob felt so confused, unsure of how to react, whether to kiss Shannon himself or to simply smile and be thankful for what he got.

"Tell me you love me," Shannon said.

"You know I love you. I love you, Shannon."

"Again," he whispered.

"I love you." Rob watched Shannon's eyes fill with tears again. "Shannon Brian Moore, I love you and will for the rest of time. And I will do anything in this world that you ask of me if I can just make you believe me."

"Fuck," he hissed and covered his face, wiping the tears away.

"I can do that, too, if you want!" Of course Shannon started laughing instantly, which was precisely what Rob had hoped for. "I love to hear that. Your laughter. I love to see you smile."

"Why do you love me so much? How did it happen?"

"The first time I met you, when you were in WCW, I thought that you were the sweetest, most innocent looking boy I'd ever seen in my life. And the first words out of your mouth when you saw me were 'Holy shit, it's Rob motherfucking Van Dam'." Shannon laughed and a blush came across his cheeks. "Now if that's not a reason to fall in love, I dunno what is."

"Rob mother… You fell for me because I cussed after you thought I was some little kid?"

"It was endearing I guess. That and the fact that you were hot as hell with your shirt off and that backwards hat."

"Oh God…" he groaned.

Now it was Rob's turn to laugh as he finally got Shannon into a different mood, making him think about something besides Matt. If only the two of them could stay locked in the room all day then he knew everything would've been just fine. Maybe if Chris acted fast enough they could manage to do that. As it was he contented himself with tugging on Shannon's hair playfully, teasing him about any little thing, and telling him that he was loved over and over again.

It was a few hours later that the two of them were curled into each other's arms on the bed. They hadn't spoken in quite a while, simply enjoying the warmth of their body heat, and cuddling. Shannon leaned up and propped himself up on one arm, looking down at Rob with a small smile.

"The night that Matt attacked me in the parking lot—"

He rolled his eyes. "I thought we weren't gonna talk about any of that?"

"Wait. Listen to me." He paused to make sure he would. "That night before any of that happened I was singing. I was standing in the rain, surrounded by only the dark night and the silence. I was engulfed in cold wet. Waiting for you. A song came to my mind."

"What was that?"

"It's by Avril Lavigne. It's called 'I'm With You' and I doubt that you know it considering the stuff you listen to."

"You listen to the same music as me."

"I have broader choices. Anyway, it made me think of you mostly because of the first verse…"

"Gonna sing for me?" he smiled.

"No, my throat is in no condition for it after crying so much earlier. I'll tell you the words, though." Rob nodded. "I'm standing on the bridge, waiting in the dark. I thought that you'd be here by now. There's nothing but the rain, no footsteps on the ground. I'm listening, but there's no sound. Isn't anyone trying to find me? Won't somebody come take me home?"

"Wow, that does fit that night doesn't it? Eerie."

"Yeah, but the chorus of it makes me think of you no matter what the situation."

"What is it?"

Shannon cleared his throat and gave a small effort to sing. "It's a damn cold night… Trying to figure out this life… Won't you take me by the hand, take me somewhere new… I don't know who you are, but I… I'm with you."

Rob smiled softly, but cocked his head to the side. "Why does that remind you of me?"

"Because… I'm having so many problems and trying to figure out what to do with my life. And you stepped in all of a sudden, grabbing my hand and dragging me away from Matt. You still are. You're trying to take me somewhere I haven't been. And quite frankly Rob I still don't know you all that well."

"But you're with me," he mumbled.

"Yeah." Shannon leaned down and kissed his lips, running a hand over his chest. "Rob, I want you to do something for me."

"Anything you ask, I'll do."

"If none of these plans work… If something should happen to me again…"

Rob arched a brow at him. Shannon's expression had completely changed once again. He was angry. No, he was enraged. His eyes had a wild look to them as he stared at the headboard, his fists clenching tightly. Rob put his hand over Shannon's and squeezed.

"What do you want me to do?"

"Kill him," he whispered.

Rob didn't say anything in response at first. Shannon looked down at him, those crazed eyes still glittering with fury. Further inside, beneath the madness, Rob could still see the pain and sorrow. He could see the violation and humiliation that accompanied it. He had seen looks such as this before in the eyes of others, ones that hadn't made it through life, the friends of his past that hadn't had the strength or support Shannon had. And he knew without a doubt that if Matt were to get a hold of Shannon again, there'd be no Shannon left to save. He would either die by Matt's hands or he would find another way. He nodded finally.

"Okay. I'll do it."

Shannon blinked. "You will?"

"If anything happens, yes. I promise."

"It all started about a month after Mattitude was first formed. Everything had been going fine that first month. In fact I'd say it was wonderful. Matt and I had just gotten together—"

"You mean as a couple? You had a romantic relationship?"

"Yes, we did."

"How serious was your relationship?"

"I'd say as serious as an average couple being together for a month. We'd known each other a lifetime already and one day he said that he loved me. So that was the start of it."

"Did you have a sexual relationship with him?"

"Um…" he fidgeted slightly.

"It's okay, Shannon," Chris said. "No one's going to judge you. We just need to know exactly what happened to cause Matt to do this."

He nodded. "Yes, we did, but not until right before everything started going wrong. I'm not the type to sleep around. I was taught better than that. So it took alcohol and a lot of begging for Matt to convince me to get in bed with him. It wasn't long after that he started getting very cruel. It started with insults, just little things, and progressed to long yelling fits where he'd tell me what a worthless pathetic person I was."

"When did he start beating you?"

"When I threatened to leave him. It was during one of our screaming matches. I told him I'd had it and I'd leave if things didn't change. So he smacked me. At first that was all he did. He smacked me and then stared at me in shock, as if he hadn't known what he did. Then his angry expression came back and he punched me. He beat the shit out of me."

"Do you think he knew what he was doing?"

"Yes. He may have surprised himself with the first slap, but after that… I think he enjoyed it."

"Why would you say that?"

"There were other times when he'd be doing these things and I would see him smiling."

At that all of the men in the room seemed effected, leaning back in their chairs, glancing at each other. Chris cleared his throat and leaned towards Shannon again.

"Tell us about the blackmail you mentioned to me before."

"He told me if I didn't keep having sex with him that he would kick me out of Mattitude, plant drugs on me somehow, and get me fired from WWE."

"So you're saying that even though he was abusing you there was still sex?"

"Whenever my body could handle it. If I had broken ribs or anything serious then he had no choice but to stay off of me. If I was only sore or something, though, I'd be forced to do whatever he wanted."

"And what did you do to try to avoid the sexual part of this relationship?"

"I'd lose my matches on purpose. I'd be stiff with them in the ring so much that they kicked my ass for real. I'd do anything I could to injure myself so he'd have to stay away."

"Okay. Let's come up to the present. Since you transferred to RAW Matt has had confrontations with you and Rob Van Dam. Tell us about them."

"The first one was after my first match here. He confronted me in the hall, words were exchanged, and I slapped him for something he said. It would've been a fight, but Rob and Booker T broke it up. Not that it did much good because Matt chased me and Rob through the arena."

"What happened when he caught up to you?"

"He caught up to Rob because he stopped to fight Matt. I kept running. Rob said that he really beat the shit out of Matt, but that he kept getting up, determined to get to me. Finally Rob ran out to where I was waiting for him in my truck and we hightailed it out of there."

"What was your next encounter with him?"

"Four days ago Matt came up to Rob and I while we were eating before our matches. He and Rob got into an argument, then Matt made a lunge for him. I tripped him to keep him from getting him. Matt said a few more things to us and then went back to his dressing room."

"What are some of the things Matt says when he gets into conversations with you?"

"With me he just keeps telling me that I belong to him and he'll get me back no matter what it takes. Whenever he gets into it with Rob he says horrible things that I don't want to repeat."

"Can you repeat some of them, Shannon?"

He sighed and bowed his head. "He tells Rob that he'll never be able to be with me because Matt has fucked with my head too much. He tells him that I'm just a slut looking for a soap opera lifestyle. And a lot of other things about sex, like how terrible I am at it, how I'll only end up thinking about him if Rob tries to sleep with me, and stuff like that."

"So Matt has admitted himself that he traumatized you?"

"Yes. He's proud of it."

"What happened the last time Matt came up to you, Shannon?"

"The same night that he tried to fight Rob, I was waiting outside for Rob to come out after his match was over. Matt came to me instead. As soon as I saw him come out of the back door of the arena I panicked and ran, hoping to get to Rob's car and lock myself in. Matt tackled me. I tried to fight him, but he's stronger than I am. He forced me to my back and pinned me down, starting to say things like how pretty I was when I screamed in pain, how much he loved feeling me try to fight him. I screamed for help, but it was no good because there was no one to hear me, and he even told me so. Then he started… to…"

He trailed off, his face gaining a worried and frightened expression. He glanced behind him at where Rob was sitting, listening intently. Chris drew his attention back to the front. It was strange seeing Jericho in a suit and sitting amongst all the other men behind the table. He was glad that Chris was there, though. Talking to all these strangers would've been too much.

"Go on, Shannon."

"He started to tear my clothes off of me. He pulled open my trench coat and caused all the buttons to come off. He tore my shirt down the middle. Then he… He unfastened my pants and pulled them down. I was screaming and trying to fight him, which thankfully seemed to make it difficult for him. He had gotten his belt unfastened when suddenly I heard Rob's voice yelling for Matt to stop. Rob made him stop with one kick to the side of the head. Matt hit his head on something else when he fell and was unconscious. Rob and I got out of there as quickly as possible."

"Why didn't you come inside and get help?"

Shannon glared up at him. "Would _you_ wanna tell anyone that you had almost been raped in the parking lot? You know it's hard enough being gay without something like that happening. And with my history with Matt no one would've believed I was raped. They'd think I was cheating on Rob."

"Shannon, with all that's gone on would you say that you feel like your life is in danger?"

"As long as Matt and I still work for the same company and on the same show, yes, I am most definitely in danger of being killed."

"You think Matt would kill you?"

"I know he would. He's made death threats to me before and has also told me that he'd kill Rob as well."

"He what?" Rob interrupted.

"Van Dam, please," Vince McMahon, who sat at the farthest end of the table, said.

"Sorry."

"Shannon, would you also say that Matt has permanently traumatized you in emotional, mental, and physical ways?"

"Yes, yes, and yes. My day to day life has become a struggle to not kill myself because of him. The only things keeping me from taking my life are my very few friends here on the show. And now the hope that it will finally stop."

"Very well. Mr. McMahon, I don't think I can provide you with better reason than that to fire Matt Hardy," Chris said as he turned his chair towards that end of the table.

"Honestly, I can't believe the things I've heard," he said. "I mean, I had no idea such things could be going on right under my nose. On the other hand, I also think that it's only fair that if Shannon gets to tell his story, then Matt should get to tell his."

At that one of the other men at the table rose and went to the door, poking his head out and beckoning to someone. A moment later Matt walked in. Shannon's eyes widened as he watched him come towards him, their eyes locking instantly. Matt narrowed his gaze just slightly. It was enough for no one else to notice, but Shannon knew exactly what it said. He was a dead man. He quickly got up from his seat and backpedaled away from Matt. Rob was on his feet instantly, by his side to calm him down a second later.

"Shannon, it's okay. He can't do anything to you with all these people here."

"You don't honestly believe that do you? You think he cares? He's a monster! He's a rapist and a cold blooded killer! And they fucking love him here! He's the biggest ass kisser in the business! They're not gonna believe me!"

Rob pulled him into his arms as he started wailing, the sobs racking his body violently. Even after Matt had nearly raped him Shannon hadn't been this livid. Rob knew that it was all taking a severe toll on him. He couldn't handle much more.

"Rob, get him under control or you'll both have to leave!" Vince ordered.

"See? That right there should be proof enough!" Chris explained. "Matt only has to look at him to send him into a panic attack. Now if that's not mental abuse I don't know what is."

"Out! Jericho, Van Dam, Moore! All of you out!"

Needless to say, when Vince McMahon says out, you get out. The three of them stayed in the hallway outside, Shannon pacing back and forth and still crying. He knew that there was no hope for him. Matt would sweet talk his way through everything, change Shannon's story completely around, and it would be over. He was a dead man. Matt was going to kill him. Unless someone got to him first.

It was over an hour later that Matt suddenly burst through the double doors to the meeting room. He glanced around, his eyes landing on Shannon. The boy was to his feet and backing away in an instant, backing straight into Rob's arms as he held him protectively. Jericho stepped in front of them both.

"Back off. You obviously aren't happy with whatever the decision was, but if you attack them again you'll only dig yourself deeper."

"Fuck you, Jericho. All I got was a one month suspension," he glared back at Shannon, "but it's without pay! Thanks to you, you lying little bitch."

"He's not lying and you know it! You deserve to rot in hell for all you've done to him!" Rob yelled.

He snarled and started slowly towards them. "You're as delusional as he is. Either that or now you're both taking the same drugs. I've never laid a hand upon—"

Chris stopped Matt dead in his tracks with a hard hand to his chest. The two stared each other down for a moment before Chris shoved him back.

"Get out of here before I really give you a reason to yell and scream," he growled.

Matt glared for a moment longer, but backed down. Once he was gone Shannon crumpled to the floor, a quivering and crying mess. Rob tried to comfort him, but for all his desire to make Shannon feel better he was too angry to be of much help. He finally walked away. He couldn't stand it anymore. He walked down the hall in the direction Matt had gone in half hearing Chris's calls.

"Take care of Shannon for me! I have a promise I have to keep!" he called back over his shoulder before turning the corner, his eyes seeing everything in a red haze as he hunted for the man that had caused all of this.

**End Chapter 3**

_Legalities: "I'm With You" by Avril Lavigne is copyright to her and her record label. Scott Steiner and Christian Cage are copyright to TNA Wrestling. Chris Jericho is copyright to himself. Rob Van Dam, Shannon Moore, Matt Hardy, and any other mentioned characters are property of World Wrestling Entertainment. I claim no knowledge of each of the characters sexual preferences or lives. This is a story of fiction, none of these events are real. I received absolutely no profit from this story._


	4. Promises

**Not Yours Anymore**

**By Archangel**

_**Chapter 4: Promises**_

Rob peeked his head around the corner carefully, watching with narrowed eyes as Matt walked down the hotel hallway. He counted the doors as he passed them to be sure of which one was Matt's room. Once he let himself in and the door was solidly closed Rob moved from his hiding spot. He hesitated no longer, stalking down the hall with a purpose he'd never thought he would ever hold. He had made a promise and he intended to keep it no matter what the consequences. He knocked on the door then covered the peephole with his hand. Matt wouldn't have a chance to get away.

"Who is it?" he asked through the door. Rob gave him no answer, only stared at the doorknob, waiting for it to turn. He gave another lighter knock, barely audible, but Matt was apparently used to the sound. "Shannon? Is that you?"

Rob watched the knob turn, hearing the click of the lock as it was undone, and slammed his shoulder into the door. Caught off guard Matt was thrown onto his back on the floor. Rob closed the door behind him and locked it as Matt stared up at him. It wasn't the first time Rob had seen that frightened expression on him, but it certainly was the most satisfying.

"It's over now. I've had it with you and everything that you stand for. You're never going to hurt Shannon again. You're never even going to see him again." He grabbed Matt by the front of his shirt and hauled him to his feet. "In fact, I'm going to be the last person you _ever_ see."

"Oh… Really? So, this is how it's gonna be?"

Rob arched a brow at him. He was frightened, but he wasn't fighting back. He almost seemed like he had known what was coming. Rob threw him to the side so that he landed on the bed. Matt still made no moves to save himself, merely rolling onto his back and sitting back up, staring at him. It was creepy to see him so calm.

"Shannon asked me one thing. He asked me to kill you if you got off without punishment. I promised him I would."

Then Matt did something that made Rob almost shiver. He smiled. Not just a normal smile, but a sweet and happy one as if he'd just won a beauty pageant. He was even laughing a little. All of it was making Rob more and more enraged. It was almost an insult.

"I always wondered when he'd finally go through with it. I guess he didn't have the balls to do it himself," Matt mumbled to himself more than Rob.

"What are you talking about?"

"You're a pawn in our game, Rob. I didn't know it till right this second, but that's all you are. And here I was worried that Shannon really was falling for you!"

Matt fell back onto the bed again, laughing as lightheartedly as a child. He sounded utterly joyous. Rob had had enough. He leapt at Matt, tackling him and wrapping his hands around his throat. He squeezed down on the corded muscles and fragile insides, feeling them crush in his hands. Matt's laughter faded instantly, his face changing back to fear and pain as he tried desperately to draw a breath. Thin wheezing sounds were all that came from him interrupted by harsh strangling coughs. He clawed at Rob's hands and kicked his feet, but it dawned on his murderer that no real attempts to survive were being made. If anything Matt was lying back and taking it. Rob loosened his grip, listening to Matt gasp and hack for a moment, staring down at the younger man with a questioning. Why wasn't he really fighting? Matt was nearly as strong as Rob. He could've thrown him off at any moment. His words came back to him. He had said something about Shannon not having the gumption to do it himself. So Rob sat back on Matt's chest and kept him pinned down, waiting for him to catch his breath.

"What's going on here?" he asked calmly.

"No, don't ask that. You'll ruin everything. Shannon must've worked so hard to accomplish this," he nearly whined.

"Tell me what's going on and then I'll think about going through with my plans. Otherwise I'm just gonna leave," he said, playing into Matt's strangeness.

He sighed. "Fine. I'll tell you. You said that you promised Shannon you'd kill me?" Rob nodded. "Yeah. Well he made a promise to me a long time before you made yours."

"I'm sorry, Mr. Hardy, but there's nothing really that we can do to help your son."

"I can't believe this is happening. Nothing like this has ever been in the family before."

Matt looked back and forth between the doctor and his father, not really understanding what was going on. He knew that he was in trouble for some of the things he had been doing recently, but aside from that everything seemed fine. Being taken to the doctor had been confusing and a total surprise.

"Daddy? Can I go sit with Jeff now?"

"Yes, Matty. You go ahead and both of you behave out there."

He hopped down from the table finally and left the room, going down the hall of closed doors into the waiting room. Jeff was sitting upside down in his chair, feet on the wall and a magazine in his hand. He looked up at Matt and flipped over. He gained his feet again and instantly asked.

"Well? What's this all about?"

"I still don't know. I don't get it."

"C'mon. They had to have said something."

Matt sat down in the chair next to where Jeff had been. "All I can think of is that Daddy got worried after he found all of my stuff in my room. Maybe he thought it would make me sick."

Jeff flopped down next to him. "Well, some of those cuts did get infected."

Matt looked down at his arms, scanning his eyes over the many slices that up until now he had been hiding from everyone. There were a few that still had slight yellowish hues to them and were causing bruises. He felt fine as always, though.

"They didn't even check these, though. He asked me lots and lots of questions and made me look at pictures and stuff. We talked a lot. Daddy seemed really upset."

"Do you think you can still go to the dance tomorrow? Diane would be seriously disappointed if you cancelled your date."

Matt grinned. "I'll go even if I'm told not to. She's hot."

"And easy," Jeff smirked.

"Without a doubt." Matt glanced back down at his arms, admiring the patterns the healing wounds made. "The doctor said something about skitz… Um, skeezo…?"

"Schizophrenia?" Jeff asked.

"Yeah. I think that was it."

"You have that?"

"I guess so. I dunno. Probably since Daddy was so worried about it."

"But isn't that where you have, like, more than one personality?"

"I dunno. Do I have multiple personalities?"

"I don't think so. You do get really scary when you're pissed off, but I don't think that counts."

The boys looked up as Gilbert Hardy came out of the office, paying the receptionist for the visit and then coming over to them. They stood up quickly as they'd always been taught. Be respectful. It was the law. Gilbert looked at each of them, staring for a long time at Matt. Then he put his arm around his shoulders and sighed.

"C'mon boys. We have things to talk about."

The three of them walked silently from the building and through the parking lot. They climbed into the truck, Jeff sitting his skinny butt in the middle and reaching for the radio instantly. Gilbert gently stopped his hand, shaking his head.

"Put your seatbelts on. We're going to see your auntie."

"Why?" Jeff asked.

"I think we all could use some time off from everything. A vacation."

"Daddy, what's wrong with Matty?"

"Don't ask such a thing. It's rude."

"But what's wrong with me?" Matt prodded. "Am I gonna die? Do I have what Mom had?"

"No, no. That's not it. You can't die from this."

"So I _do_ have something! We have the right to know, especially me cuz it's my body and my life."

"You have schizophrenia, Matt."

"What's that?"

"It's a mental disorder, as the doctors like to call it."

"So, he's crazy?" Jeff asked and looked over at Matt. "Is that why he cuts himself and writes all those weird things in his journals?"

"I'm not crazy," he snarled.

"No, he's not crazy. He has problems, though, most likely caused by the trauma of losing your mother. At least that's what the doctors said."

"So why don't I have it?"

"I dunno, Jeff. I guess I put too much pressure on Matt to always be stronger and tougher, to set an example for you." He glanced at the two of them. "You're both so different and yet so alike. It's amazing really."

"So, what's going to happen to me now?"

"You're going to have to take pills for the rest of your life to keep yourself in order. Most likely you'll have to start seeing a shrink. And you and Jeff are gonna need separate rooms from now on."

"But we don't have another room… Except for Mom's sewing room or the storage room," Jeff pointed out.

"We'll have to change the storage room into a bedroom for Matt."

"Why do we have to have different rooms?" Matt asked.

"You know why, boy," he gave him a stern look.

Matt quickly looked down at his lap, remembering. Apparently it wasn't okay to share a bed with your brother even when you had separate beds. Either that or it wasn't okay to hug him and kiss him before the two of you fell asleep. He glanced at Jeff, who looked pretty confused about everything, too.

"Matty, didn't do anything to me, Daddy," Jeff said quietly, nervously. "We only kissed…"

"Don't talk about that anymore."

"But it wasn't all his fault."

"Jeff, you have an excuse. You're too young to understand. Matt knew what he was doing."

Matt furrowed his brow. Actually he had no idea what was going on for the most part. What was wrong with kissing your little brother? When you loved someone you kissed them. It was the same way with his friend, Shannon Moore. He loved Shannon more than anyone else aside from Jeff. That was why he'd kissed him, too. Of course Gilbert didn't know anything about that. He'd never caught him with Shannon. He really would've had a fit then because he and Shannon did more than just kiss. They touched. The thought of it brought a smile to his face and he decided once he got to his aunt's house he'd give him a call to inform him of everything going on.

"Matt? Hey, wake up over there."

"Huh?"

"Didn't you hear anything I said?" Gilbert asked.

"No, sorry. I was zoned out I guess."

"You need to know this, boy. Listen carefully. Both of you." He sighed. "Even with prescriptions and therapy, Matt, you could get worse over time. It's only a slim chance, but it is possible you may end up in an institution someday."

Matt's eyes went wide. "That's why you were upset."

"Yes. You have to make sure from now on, Matt, that you behave as much as possible. Keep yourself in line to save yourself. We'll help you, but it's your brain. You control it."

"So, you _are _crazy," Jeff said.

"I'm _not _crazy," he growled.

"Yet."

"Jeff," Gilbert warned.

Matt took another drink of coffee, pausing to rewet his lips and aching throat. It was bad enough he'd nearly been choked to death, but now he had to talk and retell this story. He was getting sore. He looked over at Rob who was still sitting on the edge of the bed. He hadn't moved much during the story. Matt wondered if he was really there or just a statue. Maybe if he got out a hammer he could make him shatter like plaster. Rob looked up at him, expecting him to continue. He was real, damn.

"So you're a schizophrenic. That explains a lot."

"Doctors said pills won't do me any good anymore. Told me I need to check myself in." He took another drink. "I have better plans than that. Jeff and Shannon agreed to watch over me and the company agreed to that. That's why I'm surprised that they haven't fired me yet after you guys snitched on me. I guess Shannon didn't say the right things to them or something. Or maybe they forgot that they have a loon in their roster."

"You said that Shannon made a promise to you, Matt. What was it?"

"Oh yeah. That's what I was supposed to be talking about."

Matt looked down at his swinging feet and then at the water below him. The sun was shining brightly off of it and reflecting straight into his eyes. It felt cool to stare into the light like that. It burned his eyes and made them feel as if they were on fire within his own head. He looked over at Shannon as he leaned his head on his shoulder, his long blond hair falling into his face. Shannon was so pretty, kinda like a girl, but not. He was handsome and pretty all at the same time. That was why Matt liked him. He was beautiful.

"So, are you gonna have to go away?" he asked quietly.

"No, not yet. It might never happen."

"What about us? Can we still stay together?"

"I dunno. I don't think so. Daddy said that Jeff and I couldn't kiss or hug anymore."

"I tolja you'd get in big trouble for that."

"I still don't get why it's so bad. Is it cuz he's a boy?"

"That's only half of it, Mattykins," Shannon laughed.

"I hate that name."

"I know. It's because he's your brother. You're not supposed to do things like that with your brother. It's illegal even."

"Oh! I didn't know that either."

"I figured not."

"But what about you, Shannon? You're not my brother."

"No, but I _am _a boy." He sat up straight again and they looked at each other sadly. "We both know that boys aren't supposed to love each other."

"We'd be gay."

"We _are_ gay, Matty. We're not supposed to be, but we are."

"I don't wanna stop loving you, though. I already lost Jeffy."

"But you want to stay sane don't you? That's more important." Shannon took his hand and squeezed. "Besides we can always be friends."

"Best friends?" he smiled.

"Of course!" he grinned back.

Matt's smile slowly faded as he looked at him. "Then I guess this will be the last time we can be together like this."

"Yeah. It has to be." He looked down sadly. "I love you, Matty, but I don't want you to be in a nuthouse. If staying only friends will help that then that's what I'll do."

"Can I kiss you again, Shannon? Just one last time?"

Shannon nodded, raising his head again to look into his deep brown eyes. He couldn't believe that Matt was insane. It wasn't true. He could see the clarity and clearness in his gaze every time he looked at him. He was warm and gentle, more affectionate and caring than anyone he knew. How could anyone so kind be crazy? Who cared if he was gay! Matt leaned in and kissed him as tenderly as always, stroking his cheek with his fingertips. Shannon couldn't help the tears that came to his eyes. He knew he'd never kiss Matt again. He'd never be held in his arms. And he'd never feel his touch upon his skin like he had only a few nights ago. At least, it wouldn't be this Matt. Matt would never be the same anymore. Even now he already seemed different. His nervous breakdown had been the cause.

"Don't cry, Shannon," Matt whispered.

"I'm sorry."

"Shannon, I want you to do something for me."

"Anything."

"If none of these plans work… If something should happen to me again…"

Shannon looked up at him, seeing sorrow and deep worry creasing Matt's face. He was thinking of something very serious. He could tell because he was nibbling on his lower lip, which he always did when he was thinking or nervous. Shannon rested his hand on Matt's to draw his attention again.

"What do you want me to do?"

"Kill me," he whispered.

"Okay. I'll do it."

Matt raised his head, making doubly sure he meant it. "You will?"

"If anything happens, yes. I promise."

Rob stared at the digital clock sitting on the dresser in front of him, his hands over his mouth as he thought over everything that he had heard. Matt busied himself around him, gathering things together because he wanted to take a bath before going to bed. Rob barely noticed him. He felt numb. All this time Matt had been doing these things, such horrible things, and he had no control over them. His mind simply did as it pleased and he was along for the ride. And through it all Shannon had known what was happening. He loved Matt, but could do nothing to help him. So Rob had stepped in at the perfect moment to be put to work. He had to wonder if he really was only a pawn. Was anything Shannon felt for him real or part of the plan to put Matt's mind at ease once and for all?

"I'm getting in the tub, Rob. Will you be here when I get out?"

"I might. Maybe not," he muttered.

"Whatever then," Matt shrugged and went into the bathroom, pushing the door to, but not completely shut.

"Shannon promised that he would kill you when you got this far. And I promised Shannon I would kill you if you hurt him again. Now what the hell do I do?"

Rob ran his hands over his hair, tugging his ponytail a little tighter as his mind raced over a thousand different things. Matt was crazy. Now he knew it was actually true. And Shannon wasn't much better. He had committed himself to Matt knowing full well that someday he would have to take his life. It was a sick twisted story that confused him and yet made him feel like crying. In a way it was so depressing. Matt and Shannon could've been happy together all their lives, but something as stupid as schizophrenia had to interfere. And what now? What would become of Matt? And were Rob and Shannon ever a real item at all?

"I promised," he whispered.

Matt looked up, startled as the door opened. He dropped his washcloth down over himself as Rob came over to sit on the lid of the toilet. They looked at each other for a long moment. Matt could read people easily and he knew exactly what was going through Rob's mind.

"There's a pair of latex gloves in my bag I was going to use to dye my hair like Jeff's again. You could use those so you leave no fingerprints."

Rob nodded and left the room again, coming back only a minute later with the gloves securely on. Matt pointed to the counter where a packet of razor blades were already lying out. He had planned on doing this himself originally, but it seemed Rob was a man of honor. He'd made a promise he would most definitely keep. Rob knelt down next to the tub, sighing quietly.

"This isn't exactly what I had in mind when I followed you here," he muttered.

"What were you thinking? A fight? Having to knock me out? Then suffocating me with a pillow?"

"I didn't think that far ahead, but yeah, I figured it would be violent and bloody."

"It'll still have plenty of blood."

Rob grimaced. "Yeah, but… Never mind. Give me your arm."

Matt did as instructed. As Rob took his wrist and turned the limb over to reveal the tender flesh on the inside he could see Matt's story had been true. Faint scars criss-crossed over his skin. Some of them were horrible to look at, disfiguring and ugly. Now Rob had to add the final ones, completing the painting of Matt's life, and ending up wiping the canvas clean. He took a deep breath and pressed the blade into the delicate skin, drawing it down the length of Matt's arm. Deep red blood poured down into the water, mixing in a swirl of bright color. Matt dropped his arm underneath to make himself bleed faster.

"I want you to take my old Hardy Boyz necklace to Shannon. He can have it."

"Alright."

"And Rob?" Rob looked back down at him, wanting to leave as quickly as possible. "Thank you."

"I only made sure that promises were kept. I pray that in your next life things are easier for you."

"Goodbye, Rob."

"Goodbye, Matty."

Shannon looked up as the door opened. Rob stepped inside, his head hung low and shoulders slumped. Shannon knew instantly what had happened even before Rob looked at him. He held his breath in anticipation, watching him walk towards him. He pulled some things from his pocket.

"I need you to destroy these for me," he said and handed him the blood stained gloves.

"I will." He felt the tears spill over his cheeks as he looked back up at him. "I can't believe you actually did it."

"I had to keep my word." He held out Matt's necklace to him. "Just like you had to keep yours."

His eyes widened at that sentence, taking the necklace from him. "So he told you everything?"

"Yes. He explained himself, his actions, and why you put me up to this."

"Rob, please, I didn't want to do this, but I just couldn't ki—"

"Don't say it. I don't need anyone overhearing this. I'm going to get caught already as it is because my hands prints are on his throat. I might be able to get away with it because we made it look like he committed suicide," he said in a hushed voice.

"Don't think that this is the only reason I stayed with you. Rob, please, don't think that."

"I don't know what to think right now, Shannon." He paused and then whispered, "I just killed Matt Hardy, a guy who had been friend. I _killed_ someone. I don't think I can think straight about anything right now."

Rob started to shed some of his clothing then turned down the bed. Shannon started towards him, but Rob motioned for him to stop. Then he pointed at the couch. Shannon sighed. It was his turn to suffer on the futon. He didn't complain. Rob had more than earned his right to the bed.

"I'm sorry, Rob. I'm so sorry you got involved in this. I warned you in the beginning, but you insisted. That's why I love you. I love you so much."

It was the first time Shannon had told him that, but it didn't seem to have any affect. Rob only stared at him with an empty gaze for a moment before lying down to try to sleep. Shannon was left to the darkness of the night. His only comfort was that Matt was free and he had kept his promise.

**End Chapter 4**

_Legalities: "I'm With You" by Avril Lavigne is copyright to her and her record label. Scott Steiner and Christian Cage are copyright to TNA Wrestling. Chris Jericho is copyright to himself. Rob Van Dam, Shannon Moore, Matt Hardy, and any other mentioned characters are property of World Wrestling Entertainment. I claim no knowledge of each of the characters sexual preferences or lives. This is a story of fiction, none of these events are real. I received absolutely no profit from this story._


	5. Honor and Love

**Not Yours Anymore**

**By Archangel**

_**Chapter 5: Honor and Love**_

"All rise. The next case is Gilbert Hardy versus Rob Van Dam and World Wrestling Entertainment. The honorable Judge Martin Hearst presiding."

"You may be seated. Bring the defendant in please," the judge nodded to the security guards.

A moment later Rob Van Dam was escorted into the courtroom, his wrists cuffed in front of him. He looked exhausted, his hair pulled down from its ponytail, bags under his eyes, and he had been wearing the same clothes for two days. He glanced around the room at the familiar faces in the crowd, finding Shannon in the front row. The boy looked like a complete wreck. If not for all that was going on Rob would've thought he was ill. He looked back in front of him as his handcuffs were finally removed. He rubbed his wrists as the judge spoke to him.

"Mr. Van Dam upon entering this court room you do understand that you must take an oath."

"Yes, sir."

"Place your left hand on the good book and raise your right hand." Rob did as he was told, purposely looking the judge straight in the eyes. "Do you solemnly swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help you God?"

"I swear."

"Please take a seat."

Rob turned and walked to the table where his lawyer was sitting. He had been hired by Vince McMahon himself to ensure Rob had nothing but the best. Not that Rob really cared one way or another. He knew that there could only be two possible outcomes to the ending verdict. Either he'd be guilty of murder and face a prison sentence, or he would only be guilty of assault and Matt's death would be declared a suicide, in which case Rob would get a short jail term at the worst. All of this went through his head in a matter of seconds, as it had been going through his head since he had first been arrested backstage on last Monday's show. Directly after his match he had been met by police officers, Vince McMahon, and Eric Bischoff. Thankfully they hadn't cuffed him until he was out of the arena and in the cop car. The last thing he had wanted was for his fans to see something like that. It was humiliating enough to brought before the judge with them on.

A hand brushed his shoulder from behind and he turned to look at Shannon. They weren't allowed to speak to each other at that moment, but it seemed Shannon had only wanted to look at him. He mouthed a silent apology and the three words Rob had always wanted to hear from him. He'd actually heard them a lot lately. Still, he only turned back around and gave Shannon the cold shoulder. He was still completely undecided on what to do with his supposed boyfriend, if that had been real at all. He still wasn't sure.

"Mr. Van Dam, will you take the stand please?"

He snapped out of his thoughts and got back to his feet. He hadn't even been listening to anything that was going on. He knew within his own mind that he was guilty, but had done the right thing no matter what. That made the trial seem completely pointless to him. If he was sent to prison, fine. If not, even better. He sat down in the hard wooden chair tiredly, getting eyed by the prosecuting attorney.

"For the record will you state your name?"

"Rob Van Dam."

"Your real name, Rob."

He sighed. "Robert Alexander Szatkowski."

"Thank you. Now Rob you've known Matt Hardy and his family for quite a long time have you not?"

"Actually I never met any of Matt's family except for his brother, Jeff."

"Ah. Okay then. How long would you say you knew Matt?"

"I'd say nearly ten years."

"And in all that time did you and Matt ever have arguments or fist fights outside of your job?"

"No."

"When was the first time that you and Matt fought?"

"I don't remember the date now, but it was the first time Shannon Moore was on RAW."

"I see. Um, Mr. Moore? Could you please provide us with that date?" he addressed Shannon.

"It was December eighth."

"Thank you very much. December eighth was the first time you had ever felt Matt was your enemy, correct?"

"No, I didn't think of him as _my_ enemy. He was Shannon's enemy."

"So you fought him for Mr. Moore's sake?"

"Yes."

"You turned your back on a friend of ten years for another person that you barely knew at the time?"

"Well, yes, in a way. I met Shannon a few years prior to now, but didn't know him that well, no."

"Why would you do something like that?"

"For love."

The courtroom hummed with the mumbling of people at that statement. The attorney gave him that funny look again, as if he were trying to read Rob's mind. Rob wasn't phased.

"For love?"

"Yes."

"Explain your statement."

"I saved Shannon from a fight that he would've lost… because I love him."

"You're homosexual?"

"Yes," he said without a second of hesitation.

"Hm. Well, that explains a lot about the things that happened between the three of you prior to this tragedy. Was Shannon Matt's boyfriend at the time?"

"No, he was never Matt's boyfriend."

"Then why was Matt so determined to keep Shannon away from you?"

"Because he didn't want to lose his personal sex toy and punching bag."

In the crowd Shannon ducked his head shamefully. He couldn't believe Rob had just said that. Now everyone knew, including Gilbert, who had never even known Matt was gay. What a wonderful thing to learn about your recently murdered son.

"Mr. Van Dam, you're making a lot of accusations towards a deceased man. Don't you think that's a little out of line?"

"I don't mean to seem cruel, but I did take an oath to tell the truth. So I am. All of these accusations are true and you can double check them with WWE reports. Myself, Shannon, and Chris Jericho tried to get Matt fired from the company for the things that he did to Shannon, but it did no good."

"So you took matters into your own hands?"

"Yes, I did." Again the crowd gasped, this time causing Rob to glance around at them.

"So you admit that you killed Matt Hardy?"

"No, sir. He did that on his own," he finally lied.

"Then when you say you took matters into your own hands, what do you mean?"

"I mean I beat the shit out of him and tried to kill him. Thankfully, I'm not that kind of person."

"Okay. Now we all know that you were in Matt's hotel room not long before his approximate time of death. What you're telling me is that you attacked him there, were going to kill him, but changed your mind?"

"Well, I never planned to kill him. It was a heat of the moment thing."

"Why don't you tell us in your own words exactly what happened?"

Rob sighed, thinking for a moment about what he would say. "Two days ago Shannon, Chris Jericho, and I addressed the company about issues between Matt and Shannon. After hearing Shannon's story and Matt's, he was suspended for a month without pay, but nothing else. The severity of his actions were not justly punished. So, I decided to punish him. I followed him from WWE Headquarters back to the hotel he was staying in, tricked him into opening the door to his room, and attacked him. I shoved him to the floor where he tried to get away from me, but I picked him up and threw him onto the bed then tackled him. Without even thinking my hands went to his throat. You can see for yourself I still have marks on my hands and wrists where he tried to pry me off." He held out his hands, which the attorney took a moment to survey. "No doubt my hand prints were on his throat and my skin under his nails when the autopsy was done right?"

"You watch too much C.S.I., Mr. Van Dam," the attorney smirked.

"No, it's common knowledge now a days of what things can be found to convict murderers. The only problem is that I'm not one of those. I admit I attacked him. I admit that I choked him. I even admit that I wanted to keep doing it until I knew that he was dead, but I didn't. I stopped. I realized what I was doing and I pulled myself off of him. He was terrified, trying to scramble away from me and regain his breath. I finally just told him that if he came near Shannon again I wouldn't stop next time. I think he believed me because he only nodded. That's when I left and went back to my own hotel."

"So you didn't kill him. You only warned him that you'd had enough?"

"Exactly."

"You think he decided it was best to give up his fight?"

"Obviously."

"You think he took his own life because he realized that he had lost Shannon?"

"That was probably a key factor in his reasoning."

"What would you say if I told you I don't believe you?"

Rob smirked. "Then I'd have to say I'm screwed. You're the guy who's trying to prove I'm guilty."

"Well, let me tell you how screwed I think you are. What I think really took place, Mr. Van Dam, is that you planned to kill Matt if things didn't go your way at that board meeting. Maybe even your boyfriend put you up to it. When Matt was only suspended you went to his hotel room, choked him to death or at least into unconsciousness, then set up the scene for it to look like a suicide."

"You're a very good attorney to think of something like that. Too bad you're wrong," Rob smiled.

"I don't think so, Rob. I think that's precisely what you did. I think you covered your hands somehow, put the knife into Matt's own lifeless hands, and made him slit his own throat."

Rob noticed what he was doing. He was trying to see if he knew how Matt had died. This was the perfect moment to seal it for good and make himself appear completely innocent. He'd get off after all.

"I would never do such a thing. I may have been able to choke him, but I could never have brought myself to slit his throat." He squirmed slightly in his chair, purposely looking disturbed. "That must've been horrible for him and so painful."

The attorney's expression changed finally to something a bit surprised, but definitely more pleasant. "Yes, I imagine so. Your Honor, I have no further questions. Period."

"Excuse me?"

"This man can't possibly be guilty. He doesn't even know how the victim died. Matt Hardy was found with one long slice down his left arm, in the bathtub of his hotel room. He didn't slice his throat, it was his arm." The attorney looked back at Rob. "I'm sorry you had to go through this, sir."

Gilbert looked shocked, looking from the attorney to Rob repeatedly as people around him celebrated Rob's innocence. Rob meanwhile tried his best to smile, but he was so tired. And he knew the truth. He had kept two promises, but broken is vow to tell the truth. It was necessary, though, not just for himself, but for Shannon, too. It had been his plan to kill Matt in the first place.

"Order! Order!" The judge banged his gavel to get everyone settled down. "In light of this discovery all murder charges will be dropped. As for assault and battery, I fine the defendant the normal fees. This court is adjourned."

The gavel smacked the desk again and the judge promptly left. Rob breathed a sigh of relief and got down from the stand, being rushed by people he knew immediately. He smiled weakly and accepted congratulations and apologies. That was when Gilbert Hardy stepped up to him and took his hands.

"I'm very sorry, Rob, but when I was told of everything that had happened I must've just needed to place blame somewhere. I never thought that Matt would finally snap. I thought his medicines and therapy was keeping him well."

"It's okay, Mr. Hardy. I understand completely. I only wish that there was more we could've done for him," Rob said and patted his shoulder.

Jeff and Shannon pushed through the people then, coming up to them. Jeff came into his father's arms immediately and hugged him tightly. Shannon was next, trying his best not to cry in public.

"Rob, thanks a lot for all you tried to do for Matty," Jeff said and shook his hand. "Shannon told me _everything_."

So Jeff hadn't known before after all. Shannon had lied about that. "I tried my best, Jeff. I'm sorry we lost him."

"It was getting pretty bad for him. I like to think that now he's with our mom and can finally take a break." Jeff was trying so hard to be strong, but he was obviously dying inside. "Now I just have to go back and pick up all the pieces."

"Oh, Jeff…" Shannon reached up to his neck and removed Matt's necklace that Rob had given him. "Matt gave this to me at one point, but I think you should have it now."

Jeff's eyes teared up at the sight of the old HB symbol. He took the necklace, thanking Shannon and excusing himself quickly. He needed to be alone. Gilbert then said his goodbye as well and followed Jeff. That left Rob and Shannon alone in the empty courtroom. Rob looked down at him solemnly. Shannon nervously looked up at him, fear and worry showing in his bloodshot green eyes.

"I broke my vow in this courtroom in order to save you yet again," he whispered.

"I know."

"I need you to not do the same. I need the absolute truth from you, Shannon." He reached over and took him by the shoulders. "Swear to me that you will not lie to me again."

"I swear."

"Now answer my questions." Shannon nodded. "Did you use me in order to keep your promise to Matt?"

"Yes."

That was one painful strike to his heart. "Was that your intent from the very beginning?"

Shannon sniffled. "Yes."

Strike two. Rob sighed and looked down at the floor for a moment before raising his eyes to Shannon's again. "Do you love me?"

"Yes."

"Then why? Why did you do this to me?"

"I'm sorry. I planned it out after you first saved me from him. I was going to use you. I thought you'd get caught and I'd never have to see you again, but then you had to treat me the way you did. You had to tell me how much you loved me. You had to be the most wonderful man I've ever known. I fell for you so quickly and I didn't know what to do. That's why I was going crazy through it all. Not because of Matty, but because of you. I didn't know what to do about you."

"But you went through with it because you needed to keep your promise."

Shannon nodded. "You can't break a promise to someone you love. It's dishonorable."

Rob's breath caught at hearing him choose those precise words. It was his exact reasoning for going through with the plan as well. He had honor and no matter what he had to uphold it. Shannon had felt the same way, but things had gotten complicated for him when he'd fallen in love with Rob. He sighed and wrapped his arms around Shannon's shoulders, pulling him in close.

"Tell me how you feel for me."

"I love you with all my heart. You killed for me. There's no way I can ever love another person. No one could possibly love me as much as you."

"You'll love me forever?"

"Yes."

"And you won't ever lie to me ever again?"

"Never."

Rob kissed the top of Shannon's head. "I can forgive you in time, but we both need to heal from this. Understand?"

Shannon nodded. "I'll wait as long as I have to."

"Good. So will I." He pulled back from him and smiled a little. "You have a plane to Cameron to catch."

"Yeah. Aren't you coming to the funeral?"

"Matt and I said our goodbyes already. I'm going back to Battle Creek for a while. I need my family."

"Okay. Keep in touch?"

"Everyday."

Shannon smiled through his tears. He leaned up and kissed Rob's cheek then walked out of the courtroom. Rob sighed and turned around to back to the jail and collect his things.

Shannon paced back and forth in front of the gate, glancing at the doors every five seconds. He'd been waiting for the late flight for a good twenty minutes. He'd never been so nervous in his life. The phone call he'd gotten the night before had come as a total shock. Scared as he was he had agreed to come to the airport.

Finally people started coming through the gate from the plane. Shannon damned himself for being so short, only a measly five foot eight inches high, and tried his best to see over the crowd. Then when he had given up it was as if the crowd parted for him, people walking off to the left and right. Standing right in front of him only ten feet away was Rob. He looked so much better than Shannon had last seen him. He had regained his strength and even trimmed down a little, his golden eyes shone with happiness, and his long hair shone beautifully in its tight ponytail.

Their eyes met, smiles on their faces, tears coming to Shannon's eyes. Rob grinned and dropped his carry on bag. It was all Shannon needed. He ran to him and jumped into his arms, clinging to him like it had been thousands of years. It sure felt like it despite the fact it had only been two months. Rob squeezed his strong arms tight around Shannon's smaller frame, reveling in the feel of holding him again. He had stayed away a little longer than he should've.

"I've missed you so much," Shannon whimpered near his ear.

"I missed you, too."

He let Shannon's feet touch the floor again, pulling back to look at him. His hair was longer, now solid blond where the black streaks had finally washed out. He'd changed his facial hair into a new pattern again, resembling one of Jeff's creations. In fact he had obviously been hanging out with Jeff because he had intricate drawings done with pen down his un-tattooed arm, plus some black fingernail polish. He was radiant with joy, a little chubby cheeked from a lot of good southern holiday meals, and the most wonderful sight Rob had seen in ages. He couldn't resist the urge to kiss him, leaning down and capturing his lips with all of his passion. Shannon gave a surprised sound in his throat, but gave in easily. It was the first time Rob had done such a thing in public with anyone. The comments and dirty looks didn't bother him, though, a couple of fans did recognize them. The girls only giggled and smiled at them.

"Rob, you're blushing," Shannon snickered.

"I just got ogled by fangirls while I was kissing you. What'd you expect?"

"Well, if you're shy about public affection why'd you kiss me?"

"Because I love you."

Shannon smiled. "I love you, too, Robbie."

"Robbie?"

"Yep. New nickname."

"So are you staying at your own house this time or still at the Imagi-Nation?"

"Mostly with Jeff, but I told him you and I would be staying at my house. We'll just have to visit him."

"Yeah. So you gonna take me home?"

"As long as you promise to stay and not leave me again."

Rob smirked and touched his finger to Shannon's adorable pouted lip, giving him another quick kiss. "I'm home to stay now, Shannon."

"Then let's go home."

Rob grabbed his bag, letting Shannon take his hand and lead him away.

**The End**

_Legalities: "I'm With You" by Avril Lavigne is copyright to her and her record label. Scott Steiner and Christian Cage are copyright to TNA Wrestling. Chris Jericho is copyright to himself. Rob Van Dam, Shannon Moore, Matt Hardy, and any other mentioned characters are property of World Wrestling Entertainment. I claim no knowledge of each of the characters sexual preferences or lives. This is a story of fiction, none of these events are real. I received absolutely no profit from this story._


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